You know the drill by now…
-Dorne in the intro! So excited already.
-For a moment there, I thought the guy from the boat was Gendry. Don’t play with my emotions, GoT.
-But no, it’s stupid Jorah. Jorah, I used to like you.
-Isn’t Varys looking for Tyrion? He’s a terrible spy.
-Well, hello Jaime and Jaime’s burgundy jacket.
-Aww, he just saw Brienne’s birthplace and got sentimental.
-“Your niece?” Muahahaha. I’m loving this pairing already.
-“If I ever see him, I’ll split him in two.” Didn’t expect Jaime to say that, although I do get his point.
-Mace Tyrell is the most embarrassing man ever.
-The only good thing that can come from Meryn Trant going to Braavos is that Arya will find him and kill him. One name less!
-Jonathan Pryce is the best.
-I have the feeling Cersei wants to bring the Inquisition to King’s Landing. It totally sounds like she is.
-For some reason, I hate Cersei less since the last episode, although I’m not liking this crazy religious stuff.
-I’m so confused by this extremely violent, yet awesome scene.
-Oh no, they are going to mutilate all the gay people in the capital. No, no. Nope.
-What did they just do to Lancel’s forehead? You can’t bring him back looking so well and then do that to him.
-No, Lancel, not Loras! I don’t like you anymore.
-Whenever I see Margaery and Tommen together, it creeps me out. She looks like her mum. Right now, she is even treating him like he is her son.
-I feel so bad for Tommen. So young.
-Stannis’ wife is the f**ing worst.
-Melisandre is still jealous of Davos. That’s because he is not completely nuts.
-Jon, just ride to Winterfell with Stannis and kill that a-hole that is Bolton.
-If I know Melisandre well, she is going to throw herself to Jon. Who wouldn’t?
-Oh, please. I. KNEW. IT.
-She does sound convincing, but she also scares the hell out of me.
-Apparently, Melisandre used to watch Game of Thrones when Ygritte was still in it.
-Someone please throw Stannis’ wife from the top of the Wall.
-That conversation between Stannnis and his daughter is so adorable, I think he is my favourite now to take the throne.
-Yup. Officially Team Stannis.
-That feather Sansa just picked up from Lyanna´s statue was put there by Robert back in season 1. Isn´t this show amazing?
-I feel like that tournament Littlefinger has mentioned is quite important.
-Okay, yes, that’s how Robert’s Rebellion started.
-This Petyr knows everything everywhere.
-I have the feeling Stannis will be king by episode six.
-Littlefinger is probably the smartest character on this show.
-STOP. KISSING. SANSA. He’s probably thinking of her mum. Ugh.
-Bronn is extremely good at killing. I’m loving this scene.
-“You had a wonderful teacher.” These two should have their own spin-off.
-Dorne’s coast looks a lot like the place where I spend my summers.
-Sand Snakes! One of them looks like she is trying to resemble Pedro Pascal, but it comes out as if she were very constipated.
-The one with the plait is the prettiest by far.
-I can’t even remember their names, it will take me ages to learn them.
-Tyrion annoying Jorah is my new favourite thing.
-Can we discuss the fact that Jorah hasn’t changed his clothes in five seasons?
-We are having a lot of Rhaegar talk in this episode. I foresee revelations coming soon.
-I don’t even understand what Daario just said.
-Oh, something something, fighting pits. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
-There is something really disturbing about people who murder in cold blood while wearing masks.
-No, Barristan, don’t go there.
-Don’t. You are the only person with some wisdom in his brain in Dany’s inner circle.
-Bye, Ser Barristan.